Retirement advice from Jim

by Guest Tue 21 Apr 2009 - 20:25

My name is Jim. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife[size=9]
Martha.

When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Martha to get a
full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and
for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started
working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age.

I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home
from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says
she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't
yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when
she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill
at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some
home-cooked grub when I hit that door. She used to do the dishes as soon
as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the
table for several hours after
dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times
each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really
appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done
before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think? For example she will
say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I
just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over
two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also
remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her
any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong
points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods.
She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the
yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix
herself a
nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for
a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well
make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Martha.
I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men
will
find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better
than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys,
even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging
wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well
worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

Signed,
Jim

EDITOR'S NOTE:
Jim died suddenly on February 7 of a perforated rectum. The police
report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big
Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely five
inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer laying nearby. His wife
Martha was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took
only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defence that
Jim, somehow without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf
club......

by Guest Tue 21 Apr 2009 - 20:35

you have us all in hysterics now Steph. you norty girl

by kimb Tue 21 Apr 2009 - 22:57

thats great , love it

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